Monday, January 25, 2010

TMI Tuesday #223 - Masturbation Edition

1. When you masturbate, how long, typically, is your session and what do you think about (other than having an orgasm)? Depends on how stimulated I was to begin with... Usually I clear out a half hour to 45 minutes of my schedule.... sometimes it might be an hour and once in a while it just keeps going and going and I either give up or spend 2 hours just trying to get off and determined that its gonna happen... I'm not a quitter lol... I typically watch porn, read erotic stories or think about having sex with someone, typically its either a woman in her mid-late 30s, married and we're doing it while her husband is out, or about some girl I actually had sex with and the experience we had...

2. Have you ever been "caught" masturbating? Christ... all the time.... too many times... its not so bad if I have a sheet handy that I can quickly cover up with, but thats not always the case... I live in a tiny apartment and share a bedroom with 2 sisters... so I get walked in on a lot... Hard to get off when someone is telling you to "put it away" or, even worse, getting off just as someone walks in the room... hard to keep a straight face (and stay clean) during a time like that... here's a past blog about such a situation...

3. Have you ever masturbated in front of your computer? If 'yes' was it for your own purposes or for someone's viewing pleasure? Well, thats where a lot of porn is... so it only makes sense if I jerksterbated there... But don't worry... If you took a black light to my mouse and keyboard it'd be all clean...

4. Have you ever attended a group masturbation party? Same-sex or mixed? Not a party where everyone was masturbating.... but I've masturbated at a party a couple times... most recently at a new years eve party... When I'm drunk its easy to convince me to do something like that... This one time I stood on a table, dropped trou, and went at it with like 20-30 people watching... When I came I just about fell off a table... also, if you tried it you know, masturbating while standing up is really really difficult... like rubik's cube difficult...

5. When masturbating, as you reach orgasm, do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside? Or? I keep going... no need to stop... I lighten up a little just so I don't shoot all over the room...

6. Have you ever video'ed yourself while masturbating (solo)? Where are they now? No... someone had a camera phone at one of the parties I jerked off at.... not sure where that went... check red tube and youporn... might be there...

Bonus (as in optional)
: How often do you use the word "fuck" (or its derivatives) in casual conversation - frequently, occasionally, rarely, never. Depends on your definition of casual... I'd say somewhere between rarely & occasionally... maybe.... fuck if I know

6 comments:

Jayne's Master said...

Hello there,
After reading this post I couldnt help getting quite excited about you getting caught in the act. It reminded me of times when I too have been caught being naughty and playing with myself.
You sound a very highly sexed person, very much like me (even though I am in my mid forties, well my real age is anyway) so I know how hard it is to go without.
Keep up this great blog.
Jayne.

Emerald Yomi said...

These were great answers! I'm so glad these were posted first...when you wrote "This one time..." I couldn't help but think, "This one time, at band camp..." LOL
Em.xx

Transylvanian Miss said...

Your posts always make me giggle, really good answers!!! Oh and Happy New Year to you!
always,
B.

Landon said...

Jayne,
Nothing wrong with being highly sexed, or over sexed!!

Emerald Yomi,
lol... yes, but no flutes were involved... that I know of...

Transylvanian Miss,
Always happy to make someone laugh..

Storm said...

Great answers. Love the humor. I would love to see you masturbate while I masturbate...

Landon said...

Storm,
Glad ya enjoyed the answers... and yeah, any time any where lol